


Arrr Fic or Treat, matey!

by Anchanted_One



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age II
Genre: F/F, Fic or Treat Meme
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-27
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2021-01-04 09:03:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21195116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anchanted_One/pseuds/Anchanted_One





	Arrr Fic or Treat, matey!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [faerieavalon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/faerieavalon/gifts).

It was a foggy night. Deckboi Wirt was standing at the bow, staring into the horizon, ignoring his Captain’s imploring that he return to the Crow’s Nest. How was a man supposed to get up there with only one leg? Why was a Deckboi supposed to man the Nest anyway? Besides, it’s not like there were icebergs or Kirkwall Naval ships to worry about this far out—

Something unexpected in the waves caught his one eye; a Castaway paddling a makeshift raft. Turning his head, he lazily called, “Man overboard!” to his shipmates.    
“Aye!” they called back lazily before going back to sleep.

Returning his gaze to the castaway, he got a closer look and turned back and amended his observation with somewhat more enthusiasm. “Woman overboard!”

*

*

Huffing and puffing, the Castaway climbed one of the fraying ropes that hung from the ship. She was in a  _ really _ bad mood. When she had set out on her bare-bones raft, she had  _ not  _ expected that it would take this much effort to hunt down a Pirate Ship. That shifty little man at the Hanged Man who claimed to be a Captain swore that this bay was crawling with them! 

Now she was hungry and tired!  _ And _ she needed to use the crapper! Growling, she clambered over the rail and sprawled on the deck, facing the crew of Pirates who were howling with laughter. She tiredly got to her feet and tugged her cloth mask over her nose.

“Alrite boys, this is a stickup! I’m a-taking this ship!” That made the pirates fall over themselves laughing even harder.

Red-faced and growling, the Castaway reached for the staff strapped to her back. A few seconds later, there was a massive explosion on deck and the pirates were all sent flying from the ship.

*

*

Crowded on the Castaway’s cast-off raft, the Captain berated his teary-eyed Deckboi. “That’s why we need someone at the Crow’s Nest you idiot!”

“Aye, aye, Cap’n,” the Deckbois all replied.

*

*

Refreshed and rejuvenated, Mariam Hawke stepped out of the kitchen, clutching one last turkey leg. “Ohhh-kayyy then! Let’s get to this!”

Stepping to the Steering Wheel, she turned around and addressed the empty air. “...I have no clue how to drive one of these things! Please help?”

No one answered of course, except for some very confused seagulls.

Spirits not really dampened, Hawke mumbled something about a break and raised her staff again. A supernatural wind filled the sails and the ship started to move; hopefully in the direction she needed to go.

“Right-ho. Let’s get started with the preparations then…” 

She picked up her satchel from where she had left it, and started pulling out a shipload of items from the improbably tiny looking bag; a shiny knife, dozens of Plus-sized boob Ferelden Pumpkins (She was sure there was a proper name for them but she had not bothered to learn the name), and tons of Rivaini Witching Hour candles. 

She set them down in a pile, picked up a knife and pumpkin, and started to work carving.

*

*

Isabela was waiting at the dock. She wasn’t terribly upset that Hawke was late. She frequently was, sometimes by days. But she was a little antsy for some hijinks. It had been a good long week since she had instigated that bar fight. She had that well-lettered “Kick Me” sign that she was itching to stick on to Knight Commander Meredith’s back…    
“It’s almost Halloween for crying out loud!” She cried out loud.   
“What’s Halloween, Papa?” a passing child asked her father. She held what looked like a bag of assorted sweets in one hand, and was wearing a fox mask.   
“Just ignore the crazy…” the Father whispered, ushering his daughter along.

A sudden commotion caught her attention and she turned around to see a decorated ship sailing directly towards her, glowing eerily orange thanks to the thousands of candles attached to every window and along the rail.

There were also over two dozen Royal Pumpkins that had grinning faces carved on them, and more candles placed inside, judging by their glow. Indeed, the entire ship looked like a grinning pumpkin!

A low fog seemed to magically hang around the ship, increasing the spooky quotient.

“Land, ho! Isabela!” A familiar voice called excitedly from the bow. Sure enough, it was Marian Hawke--Champion of Kirkwall and the most ardent lover alive--beaming down at her in a pirate get-up, complete with brightly colored parrot and eyepatch. “Happy Halloween! Let’s go Trick or Treatin, shall we?”


End file.
